Honest, Open & Willing

Writings From a Grateful Alcoholic!

The Problem With Positive Thinking (And How It Could Kill Your Recovery)

Before You Think Positive, Learn Your Emotional ABCs (by Karen Rubinstein) I love Andy Williams. I really do. Moon River ? One of my favorites. But there’s one song I wish he’d skipped — It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year. Is it REALLY Andy? Because let’s be honest: it’s not always wonderful. But that is the perception of this time of year - caroling, family dinners, mistletoe and hohoho, candlelit mennorahs and on top of it all - good cheer. I feel I’m not radiating ho

6 min read

Fear of Being Seen — Removing the Masks

Halloween is over. You can tell because all the orange, black, and purple candy bags in the supermarket—spiders, haunted houses, bats—vanished overnight, replaced by red, green, and white packs bursting with Christmas trees, Santas, and reindeer. I was late (as usual; does a year’s notice ever help?) scrambling for candy to hand out, while one of the clerks—already in full retail-elf mode—was swapping out the shelves for the next season. I snagged one of the last pumpkin-shap

5 min read

The Fear Behind the Silence

God Never Asked Me to Be Silent For years, I thought silence was strength.That staying quiet kept the peace. But the truth is, silence can cost you your voice — sometimes your soul. For most of my life, I have struggled to speak — to say what I really thought or felt. It wasn’t until recently that I began to understand how deeply silence shaped me — how it hurt me, how it held me back — and how finding my voice would become part of my healing. Losing My Voice Five years ago,

6 min read

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Softening into the Season

Feeling Overwhelmed This December? A Gentle Practice to Begin the Season The Month That Arrives Too Fast I read recently that there were once serious proposals to move us to a 13-month calendar — a whole extra month, neat and tidy, all the same length. And I’ll be honest: standing here at the edge of December, part of me wishes they’d gone through with it. Because somehow every year, one minute I’m hanging skeletons, and the next I’m tripping over Christmas lights in the gar

Old Tables, Old Roles: The Masks We Forget We’re Still Wearing

I had coffee with a friend recently — she lost her brother this year — and as we sat there savoring a quiet moment before the holiday rush, she glanced around the café at the families and children and sighed. “I’m the last of my family sitting at the Thanksgiving table this year.” My heart ached for her… and, if I’m honest, for myself too.Because in her words, I felt the shrinking of my own family — the once-rowdy household of five daughters and two parents that has slowly gr

Healthy Boundaries in Recovery: Mending Fences, Not Building Walls

“Mending Fences”: Boundaries That Breathe On growing up with no privacy, learning boundaries in sobriety, and why healthy fences still let love in. I have a problem with the term “boundaries” – with what it means and how to do it. It probably started with sharing one bathroom with four sisters and my parents. I’d be showering and someone would rush in, leaving me with a cold blast mid‑shampoo, or there’d be pounding on the door: “Hurry up!” My poor father would stand at the